Reflecting Back On 2015

It is that time of the year again where so many around the world will begin writing their resolutions. Others will be celebrating with firework displays and dancing to mark the end of a chapter and a beginning of a new one. Although it isn’t the end of the islamic year, it is the end of the year for the calendar we adhere to in this country, hence it is only apt for us to reflect back on the lessons learnt learnt this year and how they impacted us. 

2015. A year that has breathed so much clarity in my vision. A year that has brought to light so many of my weaknesses, my strengths, my dreams, my hopes and my fears. A year that has pushed me to my limits and beyond, where I had no other choice but to be strong and to have faith. A year that has brought with it experiences, changes and lessons that I never expected to face so early on in life, and successively, though they have opened my eyes to different ideas about life and shaped me to become a person different, to the one I was at the beginning of the year. And for this, I am truly grateful. A year where past wounds have torn open and began to bleed but were also healed by His words. A year where stones left my life but gems entered. Amongst them one that shone brightly amongst the rest. A year I learnt that sometimes rainbows appear amidst the storm, sometimes in the form of an understanding soul, a helping hand, a sincere Du'aa or a comforting verse. All of it are gifts from God.

However, after reflecting deeply there are a few take home lessons I took away from this year. Those that will forever accompany me and remain etched in my memory. For every lesson we learnt from our past or learn in the present should help us as we continue life's journey.

• We will fall. Sometimes in ways we never expected to and sometimes so suddenly. We may lose our way for a while. Those acts of Ibaadah we were so consistent with may become a huge struggle for us to do. Our Imaan will dip. Sometimes to the point where we see no possibility of it rising again. Days may go by and were still stuck in the same place. Waiting. Repenting. Thinking what possibly went wrong? Yet, every fall is followed by a rise, and even the most wilted flower has a chance of blossoming again. Sometimes we fall suddenly, sometimes we lose our way, sometimes we make mistakes we never thought we'd make, to teach us two things. The first, that Allah is always there, ready to forgive any sin, awaiting our sincere repentance regardless of how far we've wandered. And the second, that the ground is where humility lies. Maybe you sinned or were betrayed or felt heartbreak to experience true humility and neediness before Allah. Perhaps He saved you. From the disease of arrogance and instead blessed you with the gift of humility. As Imam Shafi' one said: "Journey to Allah lowly and broken."

• Don't ever underestimate the power of Du'aa. It is amazing. It is your superpower. I remember a very specific moment this year where I needed to request something from someone. Pass on a  really important message. In my mind, I thought that they would say no. That they would dismiss or reject the message. I was worried, fearful, unsure, uncertain. Would it be a yes or a no? I remember standing in my room looking out at the window. My heart was racing. Yet I continued to remind myself, each time mustering up the strength and courage. Du'aa. Allah can change the hearts. Even the hardest heart He can make soft. Remember Musa (as) when he had to speak to Fir'aun? Or when he stood before the sea with the staff in his hands? How did he feel? Panic, worry, stress, anxiety. Did he give up? No, he trusted Allah. He took the risk with full faith and in doing so, the sea split. He was able to deliver the speech to Fir'aun with ease because of a particular Du'aa he made. This person is not Firaun, not even close. Make Du'aa and go take the plunge. Imam Shafi' once narrated a poem, wherein he says: 

'Do you mock the supplication and belittle it? 

When you do not know what is has the power to do? 

The arrows of the nigh do not miss the target,

But they have a set of limits which shall come to end.

So if my Lord wishes, He holds it back, 

And if the decree is to be fulfilled, He sets it forth.'

• Drop everything if you need to, but never ever drop your Salaah. There were times when I was exhausted. Too many things were happening at once. It took effort to read a page of Qur'an or a memorise an ayah or do things I would normally be able to do with ease. But I realised, that my body and brain were tired and I needed to take it easy. However, even if I had to drop everything else when I had no strength, there's one thing a believer never drops. Salaah. It is our lifeline. Without it, we'd be a crumpled mess. For me, Salaah and Dhikr is the fuel for my soul and heart. So no matter what your state or how intense the storm, don't let go of prayer. It keeps you connected to your Creator regardless of how distant you may feel at a particular stage in life.

• Dream with Tawakkul. Don't stop dreaming, thinking, having ambitions. But remember to dream with trust. Trusting Allah that if this thing doesn't work out for me, then Allah has a better plan. If He removes this from life, He will surley give me something better. Better than I ever imagined. This is to dream with tawakkul. It is to have high hopes but to be content with what Allah has given you. You are where Allah wants you and His plan is the best for you, though it may be had to grasp. It is to know that some people will enter your life to teach you lessons that will aid you in your dream but then leave. Thank Allah for those people. And others will enter who will want to walk by your side sharing the same dream. You won't ever want to stop thanking Allah for them. Those are the people you need to hold close.

• Scars heal but never truly fade. We often think that past experiences remain in the past. But sometimes, some experiences remain with us, holding us back. Our broken pieces and vulnerabilities are a unique part of us, they accompany us through life, so don't be afraid to take risks for fear of the past, or the fear of hurt. Instead, assure yourself that Allah will heal, always, like He always has done. That He will protect and cure. And that every experience is different, no two is the same; each teaching us its own unique lessons to better us as human beings and to draw us closer to Him.

• Nothing great comes easy. Nothing. Anything that is worth having takes its time in arriving. A woman has to carry a baby for 9 months before she gives birth. A student has to study years of hardwork before he/she receives the degree certificate. The delay helps us appreciate the gift when we receive it, but it gives us time to reflect and train ourselves in patience, in trust, in Du'aa, in perseverance, in gratitude. It teaches us strength. Allah's delays are not His denials. There is wisdom behind what is delayed and often it it brings us closer to Him as well as increases our value for the blessings we receive after periods of anticipating, longing and perseverance. Remember, "Some of the most beautiful things worth having in your life come wrapped in a crown of thorns." - Shannon L. Aldel

• True strength is to keep trying. To keep fighting. It is to give yourself another chance even if you keeping falling into the same mistake. It is to force a smile when in pain, through teary eyes. It is to let go and let God. To pick yourself up and brush off the dust. It is to forgive and let go. For strength is only really discovered when we are pushed to our limits.

In a nutshell, the ayah below truly sums up the essence of what my experiences in 2015 have taught me. It is the one ayah that reminds me to never let go of hope. That there is always a chance to blossom again. That mercy overcomes His anger. Despair is not for the believer. Hope and truth will always prevail. Tears are okay. Human beings are fragile, delicate beings. Everyone is hurting. And that rainbows will follow every storm.

"O my sons, go and find out about Joseph and his brother and despair not of relief from Allah . Indeed, no one despairs of relief from Allah except the disbelieving people." (12:87)

"Qur'an Is Happiness"

The other day, I was sitting with my Qur'an teacher discussing tests and struggles and life in general when she confided in me about a test she had faced recently. The rain was drizzling outside, it was dark and gloomy and the topic of discussion made it all the more darker. The atmosphere was tense and she looked worried and slightly sorrowful.

A few moments later, I turned the pages of my mushaf and began to recite Surah Ahqaf. As we continued reciting, I began to feel a sense of peace fill the air. The tension dropped. I paused, turned to her and said along the lines of, "We were just discussing tests and problems yet when we started reading we felt at peace." She replied with a smile on her face, "I was thinking the same. You forget all your problems. The Qur'an is happiness."

Her words, "The Qur'an *is* happiness" struck a chord. I felt it right then. I truly felt the power and miraculous nature of the Qur'an in those moments. It reminded me that the Qur'an truly is a shining lamp in our darkest moments, it comforts us like no other book or person can. It brings peace, tranquility and direction and is the source of all happiness. In our highs and lows it is our companion and it revives our hearts like the rain revives a dry land.

Reciting a few ayahs made all the problems evaporate. It was like the sun had appeared amidst the storm. Yet, I ask myself the same question over and over again, is the Qur'an the first place I rush to seek solace? Do I truly reflect on its verses? Is it my happiness?

As Allah says:

"Has the time not come for those who have believed that their hearts should become humbly submissive at the remembrance of Allah and what has come down of the truth? And let them not be like those who were given the Scripture before, and a long period passed over them, so their hearts hardened; and many of them are defiantly disobedient." (57:17)

"They are clothing for you and you are clothing for them."

"They are clothing for you and you are clothing for them." [2:187]

In the Qur'an, Allah describes a husband and wife as being garments for one another. This ayah is one that is recited at many weddings and is one that is most often referred to when speaking about marriage and the relationship between spouses. I always found it a beautiful ayah. But moreso, because it was placed amidst the ayahs of Ramadhan. This in itself taught me, that the relationship between husband and wife and the closeness between them does not stop even in a month when you are abstaining from relations and other needs. Rather, it only increases. This shows that intimacy and love in marriage far surpasses the physical act. The fact that Allah goes out of the way to mention it is halal to engage in marital relations during ramadan after which He highlights that they are a garment for you, and you are for them, shows us that this closeness, love and mercy doesn't stop because of ramadan, rather it gets more beautiful.

So, why garments? What does this comparisons teach us?

•  When you truly reflect on this comparison, you begin to  appreciate its beauty. It creates in the mind a clear relationship that is needed for a healthy and happy marriage. 

•     Clothes are a basic necessity in our life, used for warmth and beauty. The Ulema thus said: “The sign of a healthy marriage is that one of the two finds warmth when he is the company of his partner.” If there is no mercy and affection, then there is something wrong with that marriage.

•  The closest object to our body with no barriers, is our clothes. The husband and wife should be so close to each other, just like clothes are close to the body. They should be open, honest and transparent. They should share their thoughts, concerns and achievements without any fear of being rejected, judged or embarrassed.

• Clothes are a form of protection. They conceal our imperfections. A husband and wife must protect each other from external threats and from the evil of their own selves.

•  Our clothes protect from toxins coming into our body. The same way, marriage has to be a union that is covered with safety and feelings of security. This also teaches us that third parties must not interfere in every little argument or small issue.

Al Tabari says:

"Each one is like clothing for the other, as they are alone with each other when they sleep, and each one is as important to the other as clothes are to the body. This is because each one is a 'sakan' for the other- a place of tranquility to return to from the storm that is life.”

"Clothes are the most important things for the human body, as it is the covering with which it is covered. At the same time it is a perfect fit, not long nor short. The same way, the man and woman are the most attached to each other. They merge, and so are one body and one ruh…

Hidden Wisdoms

There is always a reason behind every experience we go through. Though, sometimes the reason is not always so obvious. Sometimes, Allah makes clear to us the wisdom, and at other times, He keeps it hidden. The search for answers pushes us to our knees, into Sujood, a place where we can ask, plea, and be understood. Or it forces us to pick up the Qur'an, to be comforted by stories such as, the story of Ummi Musa who was inspired to leave her child in the middle of a river, not knowing if he'd survive, or the story of Musa (as) when he was hesitant is striking a staff not knowing if it'd split the sea, or the journey of Musa and Khidr where answers were sought and discovered after periods of doubt and uncertainty, to the situation of Maryam (as), of not knowing for what purpose she was carrying a child.

Accept that sometimes you won't know, sometimes you wont understand why, because the wisdom is like a hidden treasure buried deep beneath the surface of struggle, but the treasure will be discovered, and the purpose will unveil itself, if not now then later, and if not in this world, then it will, most surely, in the next.

‪#‎FridayReflections‬ ‪#‎Ashura‬ ‪#‎SurahKahf‬

Asma Bint Umays – An Epitome Of Perseverance

Asma Bint Umays was a woman of endurance and great understanding and was amongst those Makkans who made Hijrah to Abyssinia. An honor and privilege that not all were granted.

Her first husband was, Ja’far Ibn Abu Taalib, from the Hashim clan of the Quraysh tribe. The Prophet gave him the nickname ‘Father of the Poor’ due to his generosity and giving nature.

Though they had just married, both Asma and Ja’far decided to leave their hometown Makkah and flee to Abyssinia where they would settle to safeguard themselves and their religion.

Their new marriage did not prevent them from taking this big step; rather together they came to a collective decision to set off on this journey, where they would travel thousands of miles away from their home. Thus, their honeymoon was spent in struggle and perseverance. For although they loved each other, loved Allah more.

When news reached them that Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم had established himself in Madinah, they rushed to be in his company. However, when they arrived, to their dismay, the Prophet of Allah and his companions has already left for Khaybar.

They were tired and exhausted, yet no complaint left their lips and so they too decided to embark on the journey towards khaybar. They were enduring and patient and together made a great team who struggled together for the sake of Allah. When they arrived, it was too late, the battle had already been fought and the Khaybar had been conquered. The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم is reported to have then said;“I do not know for which I should be happier: the conquest of Khaybar or the arrival of Ja’far and his fellow emigrants who have just arrived from Abyssinia!”

Asma patiently lived in Abyssinia for fifteen years, wherein she had her child Abdullah. She managed her roles well; as a wife to one of the greatest sahaba, a mother to three children, raising them in a country so foreign to her. Yet, she was strong-willed and steadfast, and all these experiences were preparing her for the test to come.

In the Battle of Mutah, her husband, Ja’far was martyred in the path of Allah. His hand were cuts off whilst he was carrying the flag and it is said that the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم later narrated to his companions, that Allah replaced his hands with wings with which he could fly however he wished in Paradise.

Asma’s tears wouldn’t dry. She was overwhelmed, hurt and heartbroken. She never ceased crying until the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم visited her which is narrated by Abdullah ibn Ja’far (one of the sons of Asma and Ja’far):

“The Messenger of Allah صلى الله عليه وسلم gave Ja’far’s family some time to mourn over his death and then visited them saying, ‘Do not cry over my brother after this day.’ He then said, ‘Bring the children of my brother to me,’ and we were brought to him like young birds. He then said, ‘Call the barber for me!’ And the barber came and shaved our heads.

The Messenger of Allah صلى الله عليه وسلم then said, “As for Muhammed (one of Ja’far’s brothers), he looks like our uncle Abu Talib, as for ‘Abdullah he resembles me. O Allah! Be the supporter of Ja’far’s family and bless ‘Abdullah (his son) in the transactions undertaken by his hands.” The Prophet, may the peace and blessings of Allah be upon Him, repeated this three times.

Then our mother came and mentioned how her children were now orphans and began crying. The Messenger of Allah صلى الله عليه وسلم said to her, “Asma, are your afraid of poverty for them while I am their guardian in this world and in the hereafter?”

Asma then devoted her time in the upbringing of her children. Showering them with love and care and teaching them the true meaning of endurance and strength. However, Asma was an all rounder, motherhood didn’t prevent her from shining her other talents. She specialized in dream interpreting, and this was gift from Allah upon her.

Soon later, and after the death of the wife of Abu Bakr, Asma remarried, to the first man who accepted Islam, and the one who supported the Prophet (s) from day one of his mission; Abu Bakr as Siddiq himself.  She had a son with Abu Bakr named Muhammad and upheld all her duties and responsibilities as a devout and righteous wife.

However, soon, she was made a widow again. Abu Bakr (r) and due to his immense love for her, told her to wash his body at his death and so she fulfilled his wish.

The story doesn’t stop there. Asma soon became the women who married the two khalifahs, as not long later, she became the wife of Ali Ibn Abi Taalib and with him she had, ‘Awn.

She was also extremely intelligent. One time, her sons Muhammad ibn Abu Bakr and Muhammad Ibn Ja’far were boasting with each other, each one saying that their father was better. Ali was present and so asked Asma to be the judge. She replied intelligently,

“I have never seen a young man better than Ja’far, and I have never seen a middle-aged man better than Abu Bakr.”

‘Ali then jokingly asked, “What have you then left for us?”

So what do we learn from the life of Asma?

• When Allah takes something from your possession, he will always grant you better. We learn this from the death of her husband Ja’far, though he was also a great man, his passing away wasn’t the end for Asma, Allah replaced her with someone else, someone who was the closes to the Prophet of Allah, Abu Bakr.

• Be an all rounder! Asma’s role was not limited to being a wife or mother. She strived to do her best in all other aspects too. Whether it was dream interpretation or struggling in the path of Allah, or Hijrah, she did her best.

• Asma endured and sacrificed. And it was due to her strength and trust in Allah that she was able to get through it all. She never lost hope and remained steadfast, welcoming the god-sent gifts into her life and upholding all her duties to the best of her ability.

May Allah be pleased with Asma and her family and grant us their companionship in Jannah, Ameen.

                                         (article published on www.inkoffaith.com)