~ Recent Ponderings ~

And sometimes, the stitches of old wounds become undone and begin to bleed to teach us that no matter how many times we hurt ourselves or are hurt, or how many times we fall or break, Al Jabbar is always there to heal us, mend us and fix us every single time.

There is a difference between happiness and contentment. The first is a feeling, the latter is a state. There are those who have all this world can offer, yet lack contentment. And then there are those who live in struggle and strife, yet experience an umatchable sweetness and closeness to their Creator that they call, true happiness.

Change is not about the past but about building on the future.

We will make mistakes. We will falter. We will fail. We will forget. For this is the nature of insaan. We rise, we soar but we also dip and fall. We wilt, we wither but we also have the ability to blossom and bloom thereafter.

No matter how far you've wandered or how deep you've fallen, rise, reconnect and restablish your connection with the One whose Mercy overcomes His anger.

One day, your story will come together and one day, it will all begin to make sense. ‪#‎TheBestOfPlanners‬

Perhaps all the disappointments, hurt and heartbreak in life occur to teach you one thing: to depend solely on Allah. He is the only constant and your ultimate source of comfort and strength.

A believer never runs out of hope. Even when the hope you're holding onto is but a faint, fragile rope, don't let it go. Hope is like a seed, water it and it will increase, leave it as it is and it will remain buried under the soil.

Sometimes, you may continue to be placed in impossible circumstances or situations over which you have no control, just to experience one thing; the true beauty and essence of tawakkul. heart emoticon
‪#‎LetGod‬

Isn't it strange how the same eyes that shed tears in hardship, struggle to release tears in ease? Hardships may move our hearts, but so too should the appreciation of his many gifts, so too should times of ease. For they remind us of how blessed we are to be in the light whilst so many still live in shades of darkness.

Our Imaan *will* fluctuate. It will dip. Sometimes, for a long period of time. This is because nothing is ever constant in this world, not even our imaan. Moments are never forever, and your life will always be changing, shifting, from one thing to another.

However, know that it's your effort that will count. Strive for betterment not perfection. Keep working and toiling, because your success is not measured by just the end goal, but the amount of effort you put in, the amount of time you spent, and what you sacrificed in order to reach that goal.

Keep going, don't quit, for true rest will only come when you take your first step into Paradise.

"And those who have believed and done righteous deeds - We will surely assign to them of Paradise [elevated] chambers beneath which rivers flow, wherein they abide eternally. Excellent is the reward of the [righteous] workers." (29:58)

Just like the roots of a tree dry out, so too can our faith begin to dry up. We may no longer feel the sweetness of imaan, our salaah may begin to lack concentration, we may not even have the same passion towards our goals and Du'aas. But there is always a way out. Sometimes, it's simply by going back to the basics. By revising and studying the roots of our faith; the pillars of Islam and Imaan. Revisiting Aqeedah revives our faith and hearts, reminding us that the pillars that hold our religion together, can too hold us up after a dip in our faith or an unexpected fall. 
‪#‎Aqeedah‬

"If Allah intends to make a way out, He will open a door. If there's no door, He will break down the wall - for nothing averts the command of Allah." 
- Abdul 'Aziz al-Tarefe

When you are on the road of righteousness, sometimes petals will greet you, other times you will be confronted with thorns, yet every thorn that pricks you is an expiation of sin, and every petal you appreciate and are thankful for will only result in their increase. So be patient through struggle and grateful in times of ease; that is true perseverance.

You're never too broken to colour the world.

Sometimes Allah will answer Du'aas you didn't even utter, and those Du'aas, you forgot you ever made. For your Lord is All-Knowing and He never forgets.

Perhaps from what you hate, He will bring about much good. For even the most beautiful flower is planted in murky soil. Some wilt, others blossom. Persevere; and you will reap the fruits of your harvest.

Even the most wilted flower has a chance of blossoming again.

Everything within its timing is beautiful. And everything that He has planned for you, He has planned with perfect precision and knowledge. Every experience, every accomplishment, every struggle, every new encounter, every interaction is part of your unique life story. Treasure every page, every chapter, every person that you meet, every opportunity that arises and every challenge that comes your way. All of it is a gift from Allah and provisions to draw us closer to Him. heart emoticon

Dream big but Du'aa bigger. What we want to achieve can't be achieved without the assistance and help of our Maker. It's the fuel that will drive our dreams forward and will remind us, that with Al-Qadir, anything is possible.

Gratitude is a never-ending cycle. The more you thank Him, the more He increases you in favour. The more He increases you in favour, the more you thank Him, and it goes on! Such is the profound generosity of Ash-Shakur. smile emoticon

"No matter how much you try 

To put together the broken pieces

How carefully you try to remove

the hint of a broken past

The scars remain

Constantly reminding you

That scars can only fade

But never truly disappear"

- Nada Umm Nour

They were real men. And what made them real was not their outward appearance, their attire, or how they displayed their physical strength. It was their intellect, their character, their service and love towards their womenfolk and families, their supression of desires and anger and their strong willpower. It was these qualities that made them role models for us - both men and women. And it's these qualities that we need to revive in order to spark a positive change in this crumbling Ummah. If we want to see a change in the world, we must begin by first changing what's within our ownselves. 
‪#‎Sahaabah‬ ‪#‎TheGiants‬

Time is our most precious commodity. As we enter a new year, we must remind ourselves, that all mankind is at loss, *except* those who do righteous good deeds and invite others towards goodness. Be the exception. Reflect over your year. Write down new goals. Turn a new leaf. Take hold of your time, for life is but moments and when one moment passes, a part of us passes with it.

‪#‎Reflecting‬ ‪#‎Time‬

Du'aa comforts the heart, extinguishes worries, reignites feelings of hope and is the perfect fuel for our dreams.

Du'aa truly is a precious, timeless gift. 

When you sacrifice something for the sake of Allah, at that moment, it may be difficult, but have faith that the fruits of your sacrifice will one day blossom, and that the reward you will receive will be better than you ever imagined, in both this world and in the next.

The more bitter the struggle, the sweeter the feeling of ease. The harder the sacrifice, the greater the reward. So hold on. Because after all patience, beautiful things await.

Your heart needs frequent exposure to the words of Allah, just as a flower needs nutrients to grow. So recite, until your heart has neen moved by it's words, until the emptiness you feel has been filled, until the certainty in it has pushed away your many doubts, and until your eyes have been washed with tears, removing your sins and allowing you to see clearly again. Melt in the miraculous beauty of the Qur'an and regain your sense of peace.

Du'aa can travel any distance. And no distance is too far when you can hold a place in each others Du'aa.
‪#‎ThePowerOfDuaa‬

Keep praying, even if what you wish, hasn't yet been granted. And keep praying, even after He's granted you what you wish.

In your moments of weakness, make the Qur'an a source from which you regain hope and strength.

There's always so much to be grateful for. So many beautiful moments to reflect back on and present moments to value and hold close. Alhamdulilah for His bounties that are limitless and for His generosity that knows no bounds.‪#‎Shukr‬

قليل دائم خير من كثير متقطع

"A little trickle that is constant is better than a strong gush that is inconsistently flowing."

You don't always need to say something. He knows your hearts calls even when your unable to articulate them in words. Just turn to Him, and He will turn you to that, which is best for you.

"We have certainly seen the turning of your face, [O Muhammad], toward the heaven, and We will surely turn you to a qiblah with which you will be pleased." (2:144)

Our tests, struggles, worries and disappointments, all have a purpose. It is only due to the tests and struggles, and the constant rush and hustle and bustle of our daily routines, that we are able to truly appreciate those few spare moments of peace and tranquility. Whether it's the unmatchable peace that is experienced when praying Salaah, or the soothing peace when rocking a child to sleep, or the unique mercy and tranquility when in the company of a loving spouse, or the happiness of a mothers embrace. It's these moments that make all else worth it. It's these moments that teach us gratitude. But above all, it's these moments that remind us that everything in this world is temporary and fleeting, and that eternal peace and tranquility is only reserved for Jannah. Such moments are but a speck in comparison to it.

Appreciate and make the most of the beautiful moments this life has to offer, because no doubt there are plenty, but also remember there are moments that await us in a place, where - if you wish, you can live in a moment forever.

‪#‎BestOfBothWorlds‬ ‪#‎Jannah‬ ‪#‎Reflecting‬

Amplify your Du'aas. Take that which you perceive to be impossible and begin to believe with conviction that He can make it possible. His armies are vast and limitless and beyond our minds comprehension.

One of the righteous said: "By Allah, I have not made Du'aa during Arafah, and not a year passes, but I find Allah has accepted my Du'aa."

‪#‎Arafah‬

The sunshine of gratitude rose over her. The beams of sunlight lighted up her face with smiles and warmed her solemn heart. Everyone is need of the light of gratitude, she thought. From the wilted plants, to mankind for their countless blessings. Without it, how would we blossom and grow? How would we appreciate the today? How would we experience true happiness for the beautiful moments this life has to offer? It's only with gratitude that happiness is increased and truly and completely experienced. ‪#‎Alhamdulilah‬

Life sometimes takes unknown turns. Don't be afraid to travel it, someday that turn will take you to untouched heights, on top of the world.

The beautiful ease that follows your every hardship will make you forget every single struggle you went through before it. The rainbow after every storm is always worth waiting for. And it'll be better than you ever imagined. Don't ever lose hope.

Faith is to believe strongly in something, whilst conviction is to believe it with an unwavering certainty. When you supplicate, supplicate sincerely with a heart full of conviction; the response is sure to follow.

‪#‎Duaa‬

Perhaps the purpose of the test is to cause you to shed tears. So that they may clear your sight, wash away your sins and soften your rusted heart.

''There is no righteous deed except that there is an obstacle that comes before it. If a person endures it patiently he will reach comfort, and if he fears it he will abstain from it.''

- Mālik ibn Dīnār (rh)

Little girl: "Granny, why are crying?"

Mother: "Because you all have to run around for me and take care of me."

Son: "But didn't you also do that for us?"

Mother: "I did that out of my great love for you, my son... hoping for nothing in return. I'm crying because I'm afraid that now, my heart may sway and cause me to perceive your care as a repayment of what I did for you. And I would never ever want that..."

‪#‎AMothersLove‬ ‪#‎Freewriting‬

There are those who roll their eyes when they are called to assist, but then there are those whose eyes flood with tears when they miss out on an opportunity to help or assist another. ‪#‎Selflessness‬

What If Tears Never Dried?

Isn't it a mercy,
That tears dry?
For if they never did,
We would be afraid to cry,

Puddles would turn
Into rivers,
And oceans too,
So isn't it a mercy,
That tears dry?

Our faces would be stained,
With marks,
Representing each time,
We hurt,
Or were in pain.
So isn't a mercy,
That tears dry?

Yet, even our tears fade,
And disappear,
Reminding us that no difficulty,
Is forever here.

Ease will come,
Hardships will go,
Smiles will reappear,
So will the rainbow,

Our hearts will heal,
Happiness you will again feel,

Darkness will be followed by light,
Even when your situation looks tight,

For tears
Always
Dry.

Musa's Staff

وَمَا تِلْكَ بِيَمِينِكَ يَا مُوسَىٰ

And what is this in your right hand, O Musa?

قَالَ هِيَ عَصَايَ أَتَوَكَّأُ عَلَيْهَا وَأَهُشُّ بِهَا عَلَىٰ غَنَمِي وَلِيَ فِيهَا مَآرِبُ أُخْرَىٰ

He said: This is my staff: I recline on it and I beat the leaves with it to make them fall upon my sheep, and I have other uses for it.

قَالَ أَلْقِهَا يَا مُوسَىٰ

He said: Cast it down, O Musa!

فَأَلْقَاهَا فَإِذَا هِيَ حَيَّةٌ تَسْعَىٰ
So he cast it down; and lo! it was a serpent running. (Surah Taha: 17:20)

Musa's staff was not something out of the ordinary. It was an object he used on a daily basis, to recline on and to beat the leaves with, as well as do other things. Yet, it became a tool of change and transformation and a means of much good. Allah granted it the power to split a sea in half and caused it transform into a serpent.

The way we use our pen, or our paintbrush, or our tongue, or our keyboards, or our limbs can be so powerful for the betterment of ourselves and those around us.

The first step is for us to recognise our talent or skill or find a means to serve the deen of Allah. For Musa (as) it was his staff, for you it may be the pen, for someone else it may be speaking.

Step two is take the means. To try. To put in the effort. Musa (as) cast down his staff, he did His part, Allah then gave the staff the power to change its form. Cast down your pen. Put it to paper. Let the ink flow through. If Allah wills, He will givd those words the power to impact, to inspire and to transform and to enrich.

Allah has given us tools to serve Him. Seek them and then use them to positively impact yourself and those around you. What might be an ordinary talent, may also be the talent He uses as a means of transforming the world.

The Power Of Dhikr

When you've been repeating the same Du'aas, every day for several years, it's so easy to lose touch with their meanings. It's so easy for the tongue to make the same habitual movements, yet for the heart to be so absent at the same time.

I found that this was exactly what was happening to me with regards to the morning/evening adkhaars. It was only after going through their meanings again, and reading about the amazing virtues, rewards & benefits they bring to our life, that I truly began to appreciate them again and the barakah that seeps it's way into our life and affairs as a result of reciting them.

The daily adkhaar are a shield from the evil of the seen and unseen, they give you physical and spiritual strength and remind you of One truly in control.

Giving the adkhaar a few moments of thought and contemplation every day, is miniscule in comparison to what they will give back to you.

‪#‎ThePowerOfDhikr‬

Inspired By The Sky

The beauty of the Sky always leaves me in awe. Many times in the past, when I was feeling low, down, or when the winter blues kicked in, I would take a glance at the sky above me and would instantly be reminded of the greatness of Allah. I would be reminded of the countless times Allah mentions the creation of the heavens and the earth in the Qur’an, and of how He raises the sky as a canopy and how from the sky He sends down rain for vegetation and growth.  

The Sky radiates a sense of peace and serenity. When you glance above you, you realise, that only Allah, the Most Great and Perfect, could create something so vast and intricate and awe-inspiring as the sky. If the sky is such a flawless and beautiful creation, then how must be our Lord, the CREATOR of this creation? Even on a cold winters day, or in troubling, confusing times, taking a glance above brings about a sense of peace, especially when it reminds you to trust the One who perfectly designed the Sky, for He also perfectly designed your story.

When I first began taking steps to practice my faith properly, I remember having a deep connection with nature. I was going through turbulent times and sky-watching and reflecting on the signs of Allah was one of my favourite things to do. It was a beautiful experience. I also know many who felt the same way when they first began practicing. There is this indescribable feeling of curiosity, of wanting to know more, of wanting to deeply connect with your Maker through reflecting on His signs.

But slowly, as the years pass, that feeling of when you first discover something new begins to wear away; when you look at the shy or the trees or the fallen leaves, you can’t connect anymore. You’re not instantly reminded of the ayah: “And with Him are the keys of the unseen; none knows them except Him. And He knows what is on the land and in the sea. Not a leaf falls but that He knows it. And no grain is there within the darkness’s of the earth and no moist or dry [thing] but that it is [written] in a clear record.” (6:59) You can’t seem to find lessons in what you see, hear or touch because your sense of curiosity has disappeared.

I realized this is what had happened to me. So many of the things in my daily life started to become habitual, like a chore that had to be done. So much so, that I had forgotten the true reason of why I was doing what I was doing. This slowly led to a decline in drive, motivation and connection. I also wasn't being mindful or living in the moment. It all became about ticking boxes and getting things done and there that connection was missing.

Many of us may be able to relate to this feeling. That feeling of disappointment because you feel like you keep falling short. That feeling of being disconnected from the Creator and sometimes even the creation.

However, our faith is something that will always rise and dip. Sometimes the dip can be for a long period of time. And it can be dark and worrying and scary. Yet, there is always a way to lift yourself back up. Sometimes falling makes us stronger because we realize how weak we really are and so we do our utmost best to bounce back better than we were before.

Sometimes we are soaring and that soaring leads feeling accomplished, and so through our dips in faith, Allah reminds us, that without Him we are nothing and everything we have achieved or will achieve is all from Him and not from ourselves. It is a gift from our Maker. When we fall we are reminded of our position as weak slaves, we cry in Sujood because we feel like we’re failing but in this is a mercy for He teaches us that the ground is where humility lives.

And so, after reflecting and contemplating of how we can reconnect with Allah and bring meaning back to our Ibaadah and our goals and actions, I found a few things that personally helped me and may help you too:

-        Be More Mindful: Mindfulness is to be fully present in the moment. To write, without thinking about the next paragraph, to pray without thinking about your long to-do-list, to sit on the grass and gaze at the Sky above without the constant urge to check up on your news feed, to read Qur’an and pay attention to each words that’s being recited, to have moments of silence where you are focused on remembering Allah. Mindfulness helps you regain your focus and be present without worrying about the future or cry tears over the past.

-        Review your goals: When going through a dip in Imaan, one of the things that helps me is to review my goals and my vision in life. Simply reading through my list and the reason why I set it as a goal sparks that drive and motivation to want to achieve them and reminds me that there is no time to waste when there is so much to be done.

-        Salaah: When we’re going through an Imaan dip, although we will still pray we find that something is missing. That sweetness. Maybe we don’t keep in mind the purpose of Salaah and the Greatness of the One we are standing before. And so, reading about Salaah and Khushu’ and actively implementing the knowledge we learn is one of the ways to reconnect with our Creator. Salaah was gifted to the Prophet (s) when he was going through a troubling time in Makkah, and it too is a gift for us, to strengthen us in our faith and remind us of our true purpose of existence.

-        Spend time with Nature: I remember when I was in Madinah, I used to love sitting the Masjid of the Prophet (s), particularly at the time of Fajr and Maghrib. I would watch the sky turn from a pale blue, to a shade of purple, to a light orange and then to a deep blue. It was amazing. Reflection on nature does help you connect with Allah. You are reminded of how intrinsically Allah creation everything and how great and glorified He is. Allowing yourself some time to contemplate will help you regain a sense of focus and peace.

Also, remind yourself that it is the effort that counts. Don't ever give up completely. Even when it is a struggle to get our of bed for Fajr or Tahajjud, when before you used to be able to wake up without any alarm, even if you find that you are completing only one thing on your to-do-list every day, when before you managed to juggle so many things at once, don't forget, that you are trying. This is what matters. And everyday is another day to do better than the day before. So keep trying and if you still keep falling, keep trying again. Lift yourself back up and seek Allah's assitance in your Du'aas for it is only He who can grant us strength and help us get back on our feet and on track, for without Him we are nothing.

Picture by Laila Hassan

The Girl Who Was Afraid To Fly

"I'm afraid of flying." said the girl as she gazed into the golden autumn sky.

"Why?" She asked. 

"Because there is the risk of falling... again. And I'm afraid."

"Look beneath you, see those leaves?"

"Yes.."

"Aren't they beautiful?"

"Ofcourse."

"Well so can be falling. Just like these fallen leaves. Don't be afraid to take the chance. The sky is your limit and if you fall, there is always a chance of blossoming again."

"But..." said the girl.

"...There is also a tinge of guilt whenever I fly, it's like I feel at any moment the wind will come and carry me away, so wouldn't I rather remain seated under the tree savouring moments of contemplation with an understanding companion by my side without the fear of failure or strong winds?"

"You're braver than that. Never a failure, always a lesson. Take the lesson and trust in the One who is always taking care of you."

The girl smiled. She knew all this but needed reassurance.

After all, she was made up of a dreams, doubts, droughts and streams, and too often they clouded her mind like the hazy autumn sky.

The Gift Of Struggles

The gift of knowing and being mindful of your Creator is one of the greatest blessings anyone can ever have. There are those who indulge daily in the blessings of Allah, enjoying His provision, with no awareness of the Giver of those blessings and pleasures. Then there are those, who are struggling with a sin or hardship, every time they fall into sin, or each time they are tested, they run to Allah, seeking His aid.

Our weaknesses, or those things we are struggling with, are a Mercy from Allah if they direct us back to Him. Imagine if we never struggled, never had to battle with our souls, would our hearts really call out to Him? Would we feel needy before Him?

Your struggles are not meaningless, they have a greater purpose. They remind us, of where we came from and to whom we will return. They warn us against arrogance and teach us humility, but most importantly, they remind us that, "Allah is indeed self-sufficient, whereas you stand in need [of Him]."

We are always, and will forever, stand in need of Our Maker.

I Wish, I Dream...

I wish someone had told me,
That not every dreams come true,
Because He has a better plan,
For me,
And for you.

I wish someone had told me,
Success is not about the end goal,
But about the journey, on which,
You will fall and you will falter,
You will break and you will shatter,
But only for the betterment of your own soul.

I wish someone had told me,
To trust more than to expect,
To Du'aa more than to dream,
To have faith in the unseen,
And to remember the world is truly imperfect.

I'm grateful someone had told me,
To never give up,
On my hearts calling,
And to pick myself up,
After every falling.

Because,
Some dreams do come true,
In a way, better than you can ever imagine,
More beautiful than you ever pictured,
A journey you never thought
You'd be blessed to pursue.

I'm grateful someone had told me,
That faith makes all the difference,
For possible and impossible,
Are merely concepts of the human mind.
And Allah to His Slaves,
Is truly, most kind.

To every new dreamer,
Sincerity is the oxygen,
that breathes life to your dream,
Determination is the key
to your success,
Tawakkul, without it,
expect disappointment,
Du'aa is the fuel
that will drive your dreams forward,
And patience is your saviour,
Through the ups and the downs.

To every new dreamer,
Continue planting the seeds,
Whatever the weather.

For every seed is planted in murky soil,
Some wilt, others bloom,
Have faith,
That yours will blossom.
If you can't see it now,
You will,
Very soon.

To every dreamer new or old,
Hold onto hope,
Even when the storm appears,
And you've cried too many tears,
Great things don't come easy,
They take a while,
But His delays are never His denials.

Go the extra mile,
Always wear that smile!
Don't ever forget,
This is your dream,
Devote yourself to it,
Find yourself a team,

And go make it happen.