Goodbyes and Let-go's

Goodbyes and let-go's. 

This statement pretty much sums up this year for me. Undoubtedly, this year has been one where I’ve had to wave many goodbyes. When I first received this topic I felt that by just reading the title, I was able to relate to it, my mind was oozing with so many ideas, feelings and thoughts, which I was longing to share. However, when it actually came to putting pen to paper – my mind went blank. Perhaps it was that, or the fact that I just couldn’t articulate my thoughts in words. After some thought and contemplation I realised that this is topic is one, which can be very difficult to talk about, and one, which we find hard to express. Since, when it comes to speaking about separation or the loss of loved ones, it incites within us a feeling of melancholy and sadness, as well as painful memories.

Goodbye’s usually hurt the most when we have to say it to those things or people we love or we have become attached to. Sometimes it’s not even us who do the leave-taking, but rather others who may one day suddenly walk out of our lives. Knowing that perhaps somebody we felt so close to, suddenly turned their back to us is the most heartbreaking feeling. Sometimes it can be harder than losing someone who has left the world forever. That is because it can be difficult having to deal with a separation when you know things can change, when you know that bond has not entirely broken, weather that’s a friend you’ve fallen out with, or whatever the situation might be, deep inside you, you have a glimmer of hope that things could change and perhaps you can have that person or thing back again.

However, most of the time that’s when you have to consider letting go.

It’s part of the test of life that people will enter our lives and people will leave. Some will come into our life as a blessing and will remain with us on our journey of life. Others will come as a test, as a lesson - just passing by.

Many times we will experience the latter. People will come and go, they will leave us, and we too will have to wave many goodbye's. Sometimes we will have to experience the pain of being betrayed and being hurt by those we thought were the closest to us.

For the believers, all this is merely a reminder of this temporary, fleeting world. Everything in this world will soon depart and thus the only thing worth chasing after, worth seeking, is Allah, the One who never dies, the Eternal and the Absolute.

Allah says in the Qur’an:

"Everyone upon the earth will perish, And there will remain the Face of your Lord, Owner of Majesty and Honor." (Rahman: 26-27)

So many times we hold on so tight to this Dunya and what it contains. We grip onto the materialistic possessions, to the people, to the point that we forget that one day everything will leave. The more attached we are to something, the more hard it will be to say goodbye once its time comes to depart and to leave. Hence, our love for anything or anyone in this world should not be for this world, it should be for Him who will never die. When we become close to something for His sake only, saying goodbye won’t be that hard because we know that He never dies, and as long as He remains by our side, everything else won’t matter.

Letting go is the same. There may a time in your life when you will have to let go of something or someone. If the thing you are holding onto is causing you to drift away from your Lord, then you need to let go. Holding onto something or someone so tightly when it is taking you away from the truth is something that is not good for you and your soul. Thus, no matter how hard it may be, no matter how many tears you will have to shed in the process, sometimes you just have to let go. It perhaps may be hard at that time, it might be so difficult to delete those Music tracks off your phone, it might be hard to let go of that boy, it might be agonizing to have to wave goodbye to a loved one you have just lost, but eventually you will have to let go. Never does Allah take something away from His believing slave except that He will replace them with something better and bigger.

For everything that a slave loses there is a substitute,

but the one who loses Allah will never find anything to replace Him.

- Ibn al-Qayyim

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